The Shapes of the Game

Battle of the Bulge
By Oopnorth
May 31 2002

Our editor's obsession with the nether regions of her favourite players (why are they always called Ben or Jonny, is it an ice cream related thing?) got me thinking.... does size matter?

Now the game has gone professional, is all that is wanted is a good big ‘un in every position? Is a good big one always more impressive than a good little one ?

In short - does size matter?

Big Up Front

An average ZP pack these days weighs in at 130 stone. Thats 16 stone and 4 pounds per man.

Nowadays it is unusual to find locks under 6ft 5 inches tall. Remember that the 71 Lions had locks of 6ft 4 inches and relative lightweights in Slattery and Taylor in the back row who were lucky to make 6 foot and 15 stones.

In the 60s a 6 foot 4 inch 16 stone man was a giant; now he is pressed to make it in the second row. Possibly England's best ever open side has had to perform at 120% in each game to assure himself of a place in the team because he can not stretch himself to 6 foot, even if he puts his hand out.

Does My Backs Side Look Big In This?

In the backs too the trend is the same, though here there are more exceptions. Centres have mostly been on the large side. John Spencer at 6 foot 3 inches and over 15 stone was one of the biggest seen in English rugby upto the 70s; now he would be par for the course in many teams. It wasn’t always so. Ian McGeechan and a centre called Richard Slater were very clever players who graced Kirkstall for many years and could tackle too but they were not big men, and their like is not so common now.

Things Can Only Get Better

Or can they ? Now we have faster, harder and more dynamic rugby. Players are full time professionals, eat well, don’t drink much (gulp!) and are in bed each evening by 10pm unless invited out by Angus Deayton or Ulrika. But hang on, one of the things that differentiated rugby teams was skill and physical ability. If players are becoming stronger, yet more uniform, will the game become more stalemate than checkmate? Frankly, who knows mate.

Is the Answer Cloning?

If this road is inevitable, how long will it be before Phinius T Arkwright-Caddick (new owner of the Greater Leeds Megatykes in 2020) decides to commission a cloning programme, involving suitable Leeds virgins and the preserved manhood of a Ben or a Jonny, ensuring a supply of ready made players for the greatly enhanced Premiership (Rotherham Mighties and Wuss Nevergonnahappens finally being promoted in 2019)?

The Long and The Short and the Tall

Rugby is changing. People are changing. Rooms are changing (pish off Lawrence). Is that a good thing. Strength through diversity and room for the wee genius, or is the Land of the Giants and boom bang a bang inevitable ?

What do you think?