I Can't Wait For The New Season To Start

By Glen Leat
July 11 2003

Harley Quin is back and given that things are quiet on the rugby front we have allowed him to reflect on other sports as well as rugby for a change. As always he has his own take on the sporting world.

* Wow Bath Rugby has suddenly become a sub-plot of Lord of the Rings with the arrival of John Connolly joining Jack Rowell to make up "The Two Towers". These are massive men in coaching terms and we could have only dreamed a year ago of such a pairing. I can't be bothered looking up how many honours they have won between them but let's say its a case of "bling, bling" rather than just "bling" (someone explain that one to Coochie Coo please!).

The fact that Michael Foley has spent the last year calling for a more experienced person to replace him as head coach says a lot about the man: these days too many people seek promotion regardless of their ability and then spend their time trying to "bluff it" and driving their colleages mad with their inability to deliver. It seems to me that Mr Foley knows his limits and wants to learn at the feet of a master, well now he has two!

We all know that Big Jack is a plain speaker and John Connolly must be one too because he looks like a typical grizzled Aussie from the old school (of course I could be wrong), so what will happen when they both fancy a bit of plain speaking together? Fireworks in the dressing room methings - brilliant, just what we want. Stir into this heady mix of ego, experience and commitment the thoughts of (Chairman) Jonathan Humphreys and (bruiser) Danny Grewcock and we could find the crockery being smashed at half time to a degree that will surpass the antics of Alex Ferguson. I can't wait for the new season to start.

* So Andy Williams has finally left Bath and gone to Neath-Swansea (sounds more like a posh Welshman than a team) as part of the Welsh exodus. I'm confused, a few years ago Welsh Rugby was said to be in trouble because it's too insular and their players were unable to perform at international level because they only had experience of playing at a standard set by Welsh club rugby. Therefore the obvious answer was for many young Welshman to ply their trade against the top English and has-been (but still generally better than the Welsh) foreign players by joining the Zurich Premiership. Now they are saying that young Welsh players only stand a chance of being picked if they go back to their roots to play domestic rugby. Can you work that one out? Mind you when you have a race that says things like "Are you reading that paper you are sitting on?" or "Is that jacket you are wearing a coat?" there will never be any sense to what they do!

* It's good to see Brendan Daniel join Bath though he seems to have been around a lot longer than his age of 26 suggests, perhaps he started playing professionally when he was 14? I remember seeing him years ago before a game and he had his rugby boots on but no socks. Thinking that this was some new training technique to help him go faster I said, "Hey Brendan are you not wearing any socks to help your speed?". "No mate", he replied "I've got hot feet!". Fair enough!!!!!

* There was great mirth on the radio this week when it was announced that a French horse called "Big Tits" would be racing in this country. You can just hear the commentator saying "And it's Big Tits way out in front". I suppose that if the horse ran in the England Rugby Stakes the crowd would feel obliged to sing "Swing low..."

* I see that Formula One may move qualifying to the morning of the actual race next year: that's exciting, 20 blokes drive around for one lap and then go back indoors. Its a bit like two rugby teams trotting on the pitch for a single scrum or lineout and whoever gets the ball kicks off. Madness!! Formula One has realised they have a poor sport to offer these days and so spend most of their time thinking up new ways to ensure Schumacher doesn't win, the problem is they may have scuppered Michael a few times this year but them up pops Ralf to grab the glory.

* I was a bit worried at the thought of some unknown but ludicrously rich Russian taking over one of our top football teams until I heard the team in question was Chelsea and listened to former Sports Minister Tony Banks bemoaning this new injection of money - then I thought good, I can just see this Ivan playing "keepy up" (like Michael Knighton did at Man U and Carlisle) at Stamford Bridge in front of a beaming Ken Bates. I used to love Chelsea in the late sixties and early seventies when they had a dream team of amazing players but they then drifted into obscurity and attracted celebrity supporters so I quickly fell out of love. Perhaps this Russian could also buy Bristol from Mr Pearce and pay the supporters to attend, they might attract a good 8000 a game then!

That's it, you've had your share of me for another week. Bye, bye.