Premier League - A Spurs hippy predicts...

By Dave P
August 17 2006

Its that time of the year when I get my Crystal ball out and predict the future for the teams taking part in this seasons Premier League. I do this every year and we can all laugh at just how wrong I was when the final ball has been kicked in May.

With the World Cup out of the way and still a few names yet to change sides for footballing/mercenary reasons this is how I think the season will pan out for all the 20 top tier sides.

The hippy view of the season ahead.

Arsenal:- Last season saw them drop from their previous high standards to the extent that they needed the help of a stomach bug to get them into this season Champions League. A team in transition as the old guard make their exits leaving a team of youngsters for Wenger to nurture. They will also have to contend with the new stadium syndrome. Teams that move into shiny new grounds often suffer from this malais and I think Arsenal will as well (Remember CL games at Wembley). Even if they spend before the window start another poor season by their standards and 5th Place and an empty trophy cabinet.

Aston Villa:- I had them down as doomed then Doug Ellis bought in Martin O’Niell so maybe not doomed after all, just struggling as there would be no money to spend. Then along comes a nice rich American and it all changes. Hang on - apparently there still won’t be much to spend and Martin O’Neill has never in my mind really proved himself. I think they will now bumble along to a 10th place finish.

Blackburn Rovers:- No Bellamy, No Dickov, No prizes. Much as I admire Mark Hughes I cannot see Blackburn doing anything to seriously worry the main teams in the top flight. They will be hard to beat – they will be hard but they will not be successful and will start the slide back down the table. They will survive but will always be looking over their shoulders as they slip down to 15th.

Bolton Wanderers: - Should have taken the Sunderland Job when it was offered Sam. You have done all you can at the Reebok and although your sides will always be tough to beat up there you have lost too many of your assembled misfits to contend for European Football this time round. A slide down the Table to 11th I reckon.

Charlton Athletic.:- Curbishley gone and Dowie coming in. A new look team especially up front with four strikers having left the club and Jimmy coming in to partner Darren. Can Dowie inspire this lot to be in the reckoning for a European Place. I don’t think so. Mid table obscurity and an unlucky 13th

Chelsea: - Ballack, Kalou, Mikel, Shevchenko – No point in going on really is there.
Mind you, I am not convinced that Shevchenko will find the Premier league to his liking. He may be the key to Champions League Glory though. 1st but you all know that anyway.

Everton:- A few changes to the squad with most notably the departure of Duncan Ferguson to be replaced by much sought after (if you believe the Palace chairman) Andrew Johnson. A new keeper in Tim Howard may help a bit but much the same as last season I feel. And an average 9th place. They are the sort of side to win a surprise Carling Cup though.

Fulham:- The seeds of an unhappy dressing room with Malbranque training with the kids. Chris Coleman has to be one of the favourites for the first Premier Manager to lose his job this season and if he does last the distance, that distance is a long way off. They will just about squeak it this time and end up just above the drop. 17th

Liverpool: - If they can get their consistency together I can see them giving Chelsea a closer run for their money than they have had in the last two seasons. I fancy them for 2nd place and a good cup run in the FA Cup – possibly in the CL as well.

Manchester City:- So far they have hung on to the starlet Micah Richards and with Paul Dickov joining Joey Barton they will be a very combative team – very much in the Pearce mould. Losing David James will be seen by many as a bonus as well however I can only see a long hard season and 14th at best.

Manchester United.:- Will Carrick be an able replacement for Keane, Will Rooney avoid enough suspensions to play a major role. Will Saha be the new Nistelrooy. A lot of questions hanging over Old Trafford in my opinion and a slide in standards again for this lot. I suspect that may be Fergusons last season in charge as he sees his protoges start to lose their grip a bit. 3rd at best and if they don’t replace Nistlerooy maybe lower.

Middlesbrough: - Southgates first chance to show everyone what he can do as a manager. It still remains to be seen if he will keep Downing at the club and the Boro Boards decision to appoint Southgate is brave if not foolhardy. Sorry Gareth – you may need a brown paper bag next time you want a pizza in Middlesbrough. 18th and down.

Newcastle: - Difficult one to call this and a lot depend on who else they break the bank at Monte Carlo to pay the wages of next. Some very talented midfielders and the pace and width of Duff this season but with no-one to cross too and still question marks over their defence make this hard to call. Roeders record should be a cause for concern as well. Having said all that I can still see enough there to suggest they will make a late surge up the table to a 6th place finish and fuel the ‘If only Owen had been fit all season’ ramblings.

Portsmouth.: - The poor mans Chelsea with Russian millions (as opposed to billions) to spend. And who do they go and sign – David James. Citehs loss is their gain. On paper they have a half decent team but as we all know football isn’t played on paper and Sol may wish he took up the other options available to him. Not so much of a struggle but they will remain in the bottom half of the table (mostly because they will be hard to beat at home) and 12th at best.

Reading: My tip to be this seasons Wigan. Team spirit will carry this team to what will be beyond their fans wildest dreams. No real money spent but Steve Coppell knows the score and he will get the best from his side. Nie to see him sticking with the players that got them up. A very respectable 8th place for them I reckon.

Sheffield United. Warnocks teams will be hard to beat, Hard and very much a clichéd gritty northern side. Wheras reading have stuck with their Championship squad The Blades have made a lot of changes and I thinks that will be their downfall. Sorry – Straight back down for you Neil.

Tottenham Hotspur:- Still a couple of signing to come I think and a team that is being tipped by the pundits to break into the top four. The signing of Zokora shoul minimise the loss of Carrick and Berbatov will provide good options at the sharp end. Martin Jol is revitalaising this club in a big way and 4th is within their grasp. The only downside is how the added burden of European Football will affect their league form. They have the quality to do well in the Uefa Cup and a couple of domestic cup runs as well could see them playing half as many games again as they did last time round. How they cope with that is the big test in my opinion but I will stick my ever so slightly biased neck out and say a 4th place finish and maybe European Glory.

Watford. Nice club but sorry - I cannot see them finishing anwhere else but bottom. Marlon king may have set the Championship alight with his twenty odd goals last season but I am sure that Evertons new boy Andy Johnson could tell him that the Premier League is a bit of a different prospect Sorry Watford – Enjoy your stay.

West Ham United.:- FA Cup Finalists and a very respectable season from the Eastenders last time round and they have hung on to all their key players so far
Despite losing Ashton to an unlucky break (sorry) that will rule him out for a while they still have capable strikers but I thinks they will find it harder this time round. Having said that I expect them to do better and manage to reach 7th place maybe but that will be more down to a dip in performance from the likes of Bolton than from their own performances. 7th Place and maybe a domestic Cup.

Wigan: - Last season everybody predicted their stay would be short and they went and finished 10th and still in with a chance of European football until the final few weeks. Paul Jewell has to take a lot of credit for that but he has now lost some of that hard working, team spirited squad. With the Chimbonda to Spurs saga still a possibility I think that this season could prove to be one in which they come back down to earth with a bump. I reckon they’ll survive but it’s going to be a long hard season and 16th is the best they can expect.
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Well there you have it – you can all laugh at them at the end of the season and point out that Hippys know nothing about football.