For Sure Championship: Liuzzi leads in Italy

The Italian, spurred on by the home crowd, squeezed 'for sure' in to conversation four times, an opening conference bettered only by Jenson Button this season. Button, by way of comparison, only just managed to do enough in Italy to keep ahead of Alguersuari, and is in danger of losing touch in the championship race.

Lewis Hamilton once again faded, with the press conference simulator in Woking clearly not being put to good use. The world champion managed just one 'for sure' over the Monza weekend, and drops to sixth place in the standings. Team mate Heikki Kovalainen continues to be given strong scoring opportunities but, somehow, fails to take advantage and currently lies last. Even behind Badoer.

"As we leave Europe, we expected some strong performances," said F1 language consultant Elaine Conedoff, "but there has been little to talk about. Liuzzi's strong start was impressive, but it must be remembered that he's an F1 veteran, so should be used to such pressure. Vettel tried hard, with seven 'for sure' mentions in Belgium, but it's just too little, too late."

F1's language standards adjudicator, Major Nameup, is also unimpressed with recent results. "Despite there being little change to the championship, there's actually been a lot of activity, with the last four races having higher than average sentences containing the words 'for' and 'sure' placed together inappropriately. This must stop, or I'll get Max involved. At the end of the day, I have some dinner."