All is quiet on New Year’s Day

London Irish's resident Spaniard leads us in the review of the 1st game of 2011 with the 1st song of 2011. Enjoy

All is quiet on New Year’s Day
A rugby game gets underway
We want to win this one,
Win this one, it’s enough with 8
Nothing changes on New Year’s Day
Yes, we lost the game again!
Yes, we lost the game again!


I had actually done the rest of the song, but this game doesn’t deserve a cheesy match report and you may not get it if you are not familiar with the work of U2. I am writing this match report not having watched the game on telly, so apologies for any errors.

I was a tad hangover and tired after having slept for only a few hours as I spent the previous night at Eek O’Hairy’s NYE party. Obviously Eek did not partake in any of the drinking games as he is a professional and had to work the following morning. There was some entertainment from the Reading Spring band before the game and a family area in the dome outside the red car park which included some Simpsons characters. I asked around for predictions and about 60% of the people I asked were confident on an Irish win. I have to admit I was one of the other 40%

Once inside the ground I noticed Bath warming up much earlier than us and Banahan practicing long distance kicks and converting most of them. As usual I asked for volunteers to drum with us and distributed some drums along our area, including a group of people with funny chicken hats. For some reason the PA malfunctioned while the teams were coming out so we tried to make some noise to cheer up our team.

The game started well with a break from Bowden who was quickly recycled by Malone passing to Losi who scored in the corner. 7-0 after only a couple of minutes. Malone scored an easy penalty and it was 10-0 after 10 minutes. Malone had a very decent first half and he was trying to put an end to all our woes at fly half. Bath came back with two penalties in succession from Barkley, But with 3 minutes to go to half time we had another try, a superb run by Delon offloading to Thorpe who scores in the other corner, with Malone also converting. The last play of the second half was another Barclay penalty leaving the scores at 17-9. I join my friends outside the East Stand, who are all confident about the win, even me. We have dominated the scrums so far, we have played some fantastic rugby, we have a strong bench... what can go wrong? Well, as soon as that thought came to my mind it started raining.

The second have starts and to celebrate the New Year and a back in form Exiles team I pop open the champagne and celebrate with everyone around me. The second half, though, seems to be quite different from the first one. Bath are using their strengths in attack and keep playing simple territorial rugby, keeping it tight and are camped in our 5 metre line with running mauls and pick and goes. Our defence holds extremely well, but eventually after a 5 metre scrum in which tighthead prop Wilson had clearly popped up Claassens scores, bringing the scores to 17-16 to Irish after the conversion. Dermondy came in for Faan and Alex moved from losehead to tighthead prop. It is very rare nowadays to have a prop that can play at either side, but doing it in the same game is something quite extraordinary. The body position is different and the muscles that are involved also change. You can tell that a losehead will have to ice his neck after the game and the tighthead will have to ice his shoulders and lower back. Alex would probably need a walk in freezer at home after having cuddles with the whole of the Bath front row. Eventually he pops up in exactly the same play that referee Mr Garner didn’t spot in the Bath try and awards the penalty to Bath, which Barkley converts to put his team in front 17-19. At this point there is a wholesale changes in the Irish team, with Lamb, Maps, Casey and Allinson coming on. This time a collapsed scrum wasn’t a penalty or needed to be reset, and a quick phase of play from Allinson to Bowden and Ojo sees our winger scoring between the posts in what it looked at the time a clear and deserved Irish victory, 24-19.

With 8 minutes to go Barkley puts his team 24-22 down as Thorpe is penalised for being off his feet at the breakdown. The game finishes with another penalty from Barkley for pulling a maul down. 24-25 to Bath and all is quiet on New Year ’s Day at the Madjeski Stadium, apart from the many Bath supporters who look to 2011 with optimism. Us, in the contrary, are wondering where the next win will come from and many don’t see it happening in the other 4 remaining games this month. Only Bob Casey gave a timid wave to us from the middle of the pitch and the rest of the team drown their sorrows and wonder why on earth we lost a game where we outscored the opposition 3 tries to 1.

To make matters worse, I go to my car to find that those who had borrowed a drum from me left it there with a broken skin; no explanations or apologies and another battle with everyone to find out who will end up paying for it. I join others in the hotel bar who tell me that we are still 4th in the Premiership, and as I type this we are 5th, only 2 points away from 4th. It is like getting to the end of January with some money left in the account, even if it is only 2 pounds. Nothing changes on New Year’s Day.